How I survive the Creative Void? The suffocation of the emptiness -Sufia Khatoon


How I survive the Creative Void? The suffocation of the emptiness -Sufia Khatoon


 Today was another day where I managed to wake up early to prepare for my upcoming events and performances this month. For my friends here, life has changed drastically I now work as a professional Artist, I teach Art and Creative writing to students, I am an Art Curator and I am a PR and Event Manager. I am deeply involved in social work mostly philanthropic initiatives and poetry. It has become the center of my life. If I look 5 years back, I was another 'me' in another time looking for myself, exploring my strengths and it took me almost half of my life to actually understand what I like to do? What are my talents and how I should work with them to improve things around me? How I have to be stubborn to continue?

Beyond everything I have learned, I have realized the importance of simplicity, honesty and dedication to work. Define happiness? I am content with my choice of working as an independent creative individual.



So I pushed myself to work through things today and in between I painted for my upcoming painting exhibit. What's worse I got hit while I was painting by this sudden feeling that I am falling in a deep pit, this place is twisty,uncomfortable and beyond my control.

I feel like my entire mind and body is in the control of a foreign entity and I am unable to function or decide. I feel this sudden urge to break or tear something apart. I feel suffocated and I want to get out of my room. This room which has seen the peak of my creativity becomes the very place of my creative void. I guess I can call it a downward phase where all creativity are consumed by the empty darkness.

This I have realized is a part of a creativity at large, it's sort of a package deal where you explore and build your talents and then waste away in sulky lacuna.

Does this thing have a warning sign? Any idea why it triggers in us and why it cause so much pain? Why we become passive?
Maybe to only balance the flow of creative vision.

 We become distracted almost by the cyclonic events around us. We are bombarded with information thus creating that anguish and anger in us.

Our sensitivity gives us that magic touch to create things. Now 5am in the morning I somehow have structured the painting and the after effects have kept me awake like an owl in the night. I haven't slept for like 24 hours and I am still working on how to survive the Creative Void. Hoping the next time it hits, I'll be able to pass it with another creation. Till then do share some suggestions on how to deal with this menacing mood swings- this is the tragedy of an artistic life.

P.S: Listening to Music helped for a while, any other suggestions would be helpful friends
Keep smiling
Keep traveling like a Sufi
Plz.follow me and leave your feedbacks, I would love to discuss about this topic. I am hardly writing here because it takes time to get you all to read things and respond but I'll keep writing. It's a cathartic experience for me

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Nameless Artist

Image
The Nameless Artist Here I stand, Here I bow, From Kings and queens to peasants and thieves, None could deny his magical deeds, The Poor and hungry his slaves, Humankind his gift, I stand here, I am through, The light if divinity so pure to know, A touch all it took for me to heal, Born again to live in peace, My world through my colors now one sees. Here is the nameless artist.... The Nameless artist...the words just flew and a string was made...this poem is my dedication to artists like them. This art my friends is called road drawings.We know about 3D road drawings back in the West which is practiced and loved by all, but not this because it is here in India that such art arises out of necessity.This particular man whom I encountered while walking down  had to say many things.What astonished me the most was that he said his art was not for sale when I asked him why he did not paint and sell his works?He said his ancestors had been in this kind
Read more
Image
Madari's of Kolkata-  lost life, lost Animals Wherever you go in your city, on the streets you might have encountered the Madaris entertaining the crowds with their highly trained and skilled performers, singing in exuberance and glee. One such performer you wold have often seen sitting pensively on the railings or pavements and chewing the leftovers of the city's amusements, what we were once in our primitive stage, are the monkeys. Like you all, I too love to walk through the busy city road and discover stories on my small journeys. In a suffocating lifestyle, these escape in nature and open air gives me inspiration to look at life and believe in beauty again. On one such expedition, I discovered Md Asgar silently sitting with his monkeys playing under the tree shed in park st and looking at the passer by expectantly. He had the look of a tired man who goes out everyday with the hope of earning something for his family and returning home empty handed. Some of us
Read more
Image
My Small Adventure.........The Monument of faith Me in Nakhuda Mosque during MySmall Adventure........... In this part of my small adventure I'll take you too places you have never set your foot ever at least I had not before........This time it is the Nakuda Mosque in Chitpur road, near zakariya street,Kolkata.....hold on I know what you are thinking...how could girls be allowed inside a mosque..... The entrance We all do not this clearly that anyone and everyone is welcomed in a mosque till we enter and follow the rules with respect...it was my first time inside a mosque...as I knew before that women were not allowed to enter...but previously on my trip to Delhi, I had entered the Jama Masjid and was mesmerized by its largeness and beauty and more importantly the peace it gave me within...the place of prayer...it felt so amazing to see thousands of prayer givers on Friday offering Namaz together..There I had come to know that in Jama Masjid, a separate place is giv
Read more